The most recent experience that brought on the need for this ever-important me time came just a short 12 hours ago. When I got peed on. A lot. And as usual with these funny mommy times my first thought was "this will make a funny blog."
The house was quite. Everyone in bed but me and sweet baby Will. We are having to put some extra effort into helping him gain weight so feedings are important even late at night when he is very tired. He only nursed for a few minutes before he conked out on my lap. The kind of sleep where his mouth is open and eyes are rolled back with just tiny slits open.....family trait....sleeping with the ol' eyes open.
Anywho, he didn't eat enough to satisfy his daily requirements so I had the grand plan of doing a diaper change to rouse him enough to want to eat again. I laid him down on my lap for a quick change-a-roo. And of course as all mommy's of little boys knows sometimes it just takes that burst of fresh air to get em' going. Pee everywhere. Fountain straight up in the air and coming straight down on both of us. The only choice at that time is just to cover up and let it run it's course. I actually had one of those cartoon moments when I lift up the burp cloth that I used to cover him with to see if he was done only to have him squirt one more time at me. I'm pretty sure it was intentional on his part.
Mission accomplished. He was awake now. Laughing in fact. Very sure at this point that it was at my expense. So I gathered us both and headed up stairs. I was soaked clear through my yoga pants, underwear and nursing tank-top. Oddly enough, he hardly had any pee on himself. Coincidence? I think not.
As I laid him out on his changing table he was happy as a little lark. I, however, had pee running down my leg. Seriously. So I wanted out of my wet clothes. I decided to strip down right there and just throw it all in his laundry basket. But I was still a little chilly so I left my fuzzy warm socks on. Yes, there I was naked as a jaybird save for a pair of turquoise and brown fuzzy socks changing Will's clothes and diaper. And as soon as I got him all cleaned up and laid him in his bed I strolled my happy little naked ass down the hallway to put some clothes on. I was careful not to disturb Sleeping....not Beauty...hmmmmm.....Sleeping Gorilla? I mean the man sleeps with no shirt on and we all know by now that he has his own built in sweater...and it's winter. Doesn't fur get thicker in the winter? Perhaps Sleeping Bear might be more appropriate. He was sleeping hard enough to be hibernating anyway. I digress.
So I dressed in the dark, made it back to Will's room to scoop him up and finally finish the last feeding of the night. I got us all comfy and cozy back in my recliner and promptly realized I had my nursing tank-top on backwards. Gonna make it slightly difficult for him to eat that way. So I had to strip down one more time, turn it around, get us all settled again and start feeding him.
And God love the child. He knew he had given me enough trouble late at night that he did me the huge favor of sleeping through the night. Sweet, sweet kid. He's a keeper.
So now it's ME day. ME ME ME. Did I already say that? I might be beating that drum a little too hard. I've had my massage (don't be too jealous....it was preceded by my yearly well woman check....TMI? we're past that), had my lunch, wrote my blog. There's only one more thing to do on the Me Day To Do list. N. A. P.
nighty night, folks. Me and my fuzzy socks are gonna go snuggle in.
