Who says I don't look like Brooke Shields?

It's been over 2 months since my last blog post.  Life has been busy.  I try desperately to get some time set aside to post and I have a few started but just can't seem to get them finished. For months I have been thinking of this great idea for a post and today I took the time to put it together.  It was sooooooo worth it.  I am certain, without a doubt, that you will enjoy this little trip down memory lane.

It will be hard not to focus on my clothing because it, in and of itself, is rather entertaining.  But try your hardest to stay focused on the ever changing hairdo's.  Some pictures you won't be able to help yourself from staring at it.   Some pictures you won't be able to peel your eyes away from it.  While others you will try to avoid looking at it straight on.  I can't say I blame you. 

I feel certain that God has given me boys because he knows it would be a sin for me to put girls though anything remotely similar.  Mind you, I don't blame my mother.  Most of the time this was my idea. 

It all started back in 1977.  Such a sweet little baby girl with blond hair.

Gettin' my tap dancin' on with my saddle oxfords. 

And then......my hair got darker.  And for some reason that required a bowl cut.  And I just wanted to be like my daddy.

Who knows what my hair looked like at Pre-School.  I am pretty sure it never came out of that hood.  Apparently I was the only one bracing for a snow storm (that's me on the top right). 

Oh, there's my hair.  Perfectly curled under for 1st day of Kindergarten. 

 

And then......brace yourselves.  I found the joy of perms.  Enter:  the Afro stage! 

 

 

Now this next picture is my absolute favorite.  Let me set the stage for you.  It has to have been around 1984.  Someone was taking "professional" photos at Hales Market....because that is a perfectly normal place to have your photos taken.  Next to the bread and cereal aisle.  I had recently seen a picture of Brooke Shields smiling with her mouth open.  I thought she was beautiful!  I was certain that I could match it.  Positive I looked just like her.  If your opinion differs and you think that I am NOT her spitting image please just keep those thoughts to yourself. So here is my very best Brooke Shields look.   Brace yourself. 

 

 

 

And I rocked that fro all the way into 2nd grade.  





 

And then something happened in 3rd grade.  Perhaps we were poor that year.  No money for perms.  So same hairdo, minus the tight curls. 



 

 

 But that was too flat.....my hair needs some BODY to it!  I don't know where it came from but somehow, somewhere, someone invented this little Mary Lou Retton do with a twist.....flip up all of the ends into a bell shaped NIGHTMARE!!!!

 

Although it worked perfect for the ring of flowers that I wore as flower girl at Karol and Peter's wedding!  

And here it is....in all it's glory....year after year....(5th grade)

after year.....oh yes, add some glasses.....that makes it all better! 

after year.....I am pretty sure this is my first day of 7th grade.  I'm sure I fit right in moving from Covel D Searcy Elementary in Gallatin to Raytown Middle School.  (nice Holly Hobby bed spread)

OHHHHH, it wasn't enough to take one school picture this year (7th grade).  I had to do it twice.  Once in Gallatin so they could be ordered with my sister's pictures to give to all of the grandparents aunt's and uncles....and then another one at my actual school.  This stage in my life was so worth capturing twice.  UGH!!!!

So this morning I pulled out the picture on the left and asked the boys "Who is this?"  They pondered and pondered.  They could not figure it out.  I so badly wish I had the camera on when I told them it was me.  They had the most horrified looks on their sweet little faces.  Justin insisted it could not be me because the picture is "a boy." 

BUT, when I turned the page of the photo album to this little gem of a picture Justin said "Ok, that one looks like you" 

 

 

Ok, enough of the short hair. It was finally time to grow it out.  Please just focus on the hair and try your hardest to ignore the Hammer pants.  

 

 

 

9th grade.  Contacts.  Braces.  Letting the curls go natural finally. 

Longest my hair has ever been. 

But then it would smack me in the face when I went upside down.....soooooo......

 

 

It was back to short hair for Senior Pictures.  Pretty sure I capture all requirements in these photos.  Standard blazer for formal picture.  Vest and jeans for outdoor picture.  And sexpot/lay on one arm/twist head in awkward position trying to look good picture.  

 

ME, ME, ME....PEE PEE PEE

I took the day off today.  For no particular reason other than that it is in my own best interest...and really the interest of those around me....to have a little me time.  ME ME ME.  I might just skip (in the socks pictured at left....which you will find amusing as you read on) around the house singing that at the top of my lungs.  To further enhance the ME experience I just got a hot stone massage.  BOOM SON (as my young son's would say). 

The most recent experience that brought on the need for this ever-important me time came just a short 12 hours ago.  When I got peed on.  A lot.  And as usual with these funny mommy times my first thought was "this will make a funny blog." 

The house was quite.  Everyone in bed but me and sweet baby Will.  We are having to put some extra effort into helping him gain weight so feedings are important even late at night when he is very tired.  He only nursed for a few minutes before he conked out on my lap.  The kind of sleep where his mouth is open and eyes are rolled back with just tiny slits open.....family trait....sleeping with the ol' eyes open. 

Anywho, he didn't eat enough to satisfy his daily requirements so I had the grand plan of doing a  diaper change to rouse him enough to want to eat again.  I laid him down on my lap for a quick change-a-roo.  And of course as all mommy's of little boys knows sometimes it just takes that burst of fresh air to get em' going.  Pee everywhere.  Fountain straight up in the air and coming straight down on both of us.  The only choice at that time is just to cover up and let it run it's course.  I actually had one of those cartoon moments when I lift up the burp cloth that I used to cover him with to see if he was done only to have him squirt one more time at me.  I'm pretty sure it was intentional on his part. 

Mission accomplished.  He was awake now.  Laughing in fact.  Very sure at this point that it was at my expense.  So I gathered us both and headed up stairs.  I was soaked clear through my yoga pants, underwear and nursing tank-top.  Oddly enough, he hardly had any pee on himself.  Coincidence?  I think not. 

As I laid him out on his changing table he was happy as a little lark.  I, however, had pee running down my leg.  Seriously.  So I wanted out of my wet clothes.  I decided to strip down right there and just throw it all in his laundry basket.  But I was still a little chilly so I left my fuzzy warm socks on.  Yes, there I was naked as a jaybird save for a pair of turquoise and brown fuzzy socks changing Will's clothes and diaper.  And as soon as I got him all cleaned up and laid him in his bed I strolled my happy little naked ass down the hallway to put some clothes on.  I was careful not to disturb Sleeping....not Beauty...hmmmmm.....Sleeping Gorilla?  I mean the man sleeps with no shirt on and we all know by now that he has his own built in sweater...and it's winter.  Doesn't fur get thicker in the winter?  Perhaps Sleeping Bear might be more appropriate.  He was sleeping hard enough to be hibernating anyway.  I digress.

So I dressed in the dark, made it back to Will's room to scoop him up and finally finish the last feeding of the night. I got us all comfy and cozy back in my recliner and promptly realized I had my nursing tank-top on backwards.  Gonna make it slightly difficult for him to eat that way.  So I had to strip down one more time, turn it around, get us all settled again and start feeding him. 

And God love the child.  He knew he had given me enough trouble late at night that he did me the huge favor of sleeping through the night.  Sweet, sweet kid.  He's a keeper.

So now it's ME day.  ME ME ME.  Did I already say that?  I might be beating that drum a little too hard.  I've had my massage (don't be too jealous....it was preceded by my yearly well woman check....TMI?  we're past that), had my lunch, wrote my blog.   There's only one more thing to do on the Me Day To Do list.  N. A. P. 

nighty night, folks.  Me and my fuzzy socks are gonna go snuggle in.

Funny Boys

Anyone who knows Justin or hears my stories about him knows that he is just a funny kid.  Just a downright funny, funny little boy.  This week has been no exception.  There have been several instances that have sent me into fits of giggles. 

On Monday he accidentally poked Leo in the eye.  No, seriously was an accident.  I saw it  happen.  So Leo was crying and carrying on and Justin felt so bad.  Justin kept telling Leo in his most sincere and encouraging voice "Don't worry buddy.  You still have TWO eyes.  You do, Leo.  You still have TWOOOOO eyes.  It's OK.  You have two eyes.  I promise.  You still have two eyes." 

My Valentine's gift to the boys was a trip to McDonald's Play Land.  I know.  You are soooo impressed!  We got food from the drive thru after playing inside and I asked the boys if they want their "usual."  When it was our turn to order Justin yells from the back "Just tell them we want our usual.  They should just know our usual so you don't have to say it all of the time."  OK, seriously we only visit McDonald's once every few weeks but he was making it sound like we are there every day.  He went on and on and on about how even if there is a different girl working they should know our car and our faces and just know our "usual." 

Friday morning I had to take Will to the doctor so we didn't have our usual morning rush to get out of the house.  Justin was slow to get out of bed so I bribed him with $1 if he takes his shower and gets dressed without having to be told 15 times.  He complied.  He has an envelope for saving money for a special Lego castle that he wants to buy after he gets all of his birthday money.  After he got ready he came into my bathroom to tell me that he doesn't want to take my dollar.  He said that I always have to give my money to him and I never get to keep any for myself so he really, really wants me to just get his dollar.  Then he suggested that I start my own envelope to start saving money for "that washer that dad keeps saying he will buy you but he hasn't bought you yet.  Maybe you can just start an envelope and buy it for yourself."  Good idea buddy!  I kept my dollar.  Only about 900 more and laundry will be a breeze! 

Friday night Jeremy fixed the boys dinner while I fed Will.  The boys were eating at the table and Jeremy is running back and forth getting them stuff and trying to fix our dinner (after I screwed it up by forgetting to turn the oven on and bake our potatoes in advance!).  Out of nowhere Justin says "Dad, I promise not to say the S word anymore."  Oh Geez.  First of all I thought he said "F word" so I was really worried.  Is it wrong that I was relieved when I realized he said "S word"?   So of course we have to ask the follow up "what is the S word?"  And then he won't say it because it's a bad word, etc but Jeremy can't let it go so he asks again to which Justin replies "Sexy.  I can't say sexy anymore because that is a bad word so when I sing I have to say 'Foxy Lady'"  I seriously about lost it.  I had to hide my face behind the What To Expect In the First Year book that I was pouring over to make sure Will isn't falling behind!  And by "make sure" of course I mean obsess about it and analyze his every move. 

Not to be outdone, I heard Leo telling Justin at dinner earlier this week "We should never drive like Dad.  He drives crazy and I will never drive like Dad."  I swear I didn't tell him to say that.  I mean he may have overheard a conversation or two that we have had about it.  And by conversation, of course I mean when I freak out on Jeremy when we are in the car and he make inappropriate comments or gestures to other drivers as he weaves in and out of traffic. Yeah, it's possible that's where Leo picked up that little gem. 

And then his own funny moment again this morning when Leo went into Will's room and woke him up because he "just had to ask him if he remembers that I have a band aid on my finger."  Oh yeah, Leo.  Will in all of his mature 3 months has been worried sick over the scratch on your thumb.  Maybe THAT'S why he was up three times last night.  He was worried about your band aid. 

Love these little guys!  They keep me laughing every single day! 

Who Cares? DayCares

Recently I saw a picture of my childhood babysitter, Jackie, on Facebook and I started reminiscing.  The good ol' days.  I have a few pretty clear memories of my time there.  I had to be about 5-7 years old because Allison was already born and I was in school for at least part of the time because I can remember riding the bus there in the afternoons. 

You know how it's funny the things that stick with over time?  Well that's what happened to me as I started thinking back....way back.  So here's a few that popped into my head immediately.  We, and by we I mean myself, my sister Mandi, Jackie's daughter Heather, made our own version of Olivia Newton John's "Let's Get Physical" video complete with leotards, sweatbands on our heads, and pillows stuffed in our shirts/leotards which were then removed to show off our fabulous new "physical" bodies!  So funny!  I bet Jackie loved that one! 

I also remember that Jackie had hot syrup for pancakes.  How funny is that?  What a funny thing to remember.  In my house we were straight out of the ol' Mrs. Buttersworth bottle and I was in awe of her hot syrup warmed up on the stovetop. 

Another favorite memory is listening to the Thriller record for the first time and being scared to death of the creepy laugh at the end!  Oh, and Toni Basil's "Hey Mickey, You're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind!  Hey Mickey!!"  I remember singing that while jumping on Heather's bed. 

Great memories!  Being a working mother is super hard work but I know my kids are making some wonderful memories with Ellan and Heather.  I can't wait to hear their memories some day when they are grown.  But of course I had to ask them now too.... 

Justin said his favorite thing is "usually eating goodies like cookies or something. Or playing and trapping cars.  And doing pumpkins at Halloween"

Leo said his favorite thing is "when I learn new papers" meaning pre-school time.

I asked Will and of course he said his favorite part of daycare is Penny!!  In fact, just this week Justin checked with us to make sure that Penny isn't related to us so Will can marry her when they get older. 

Random New Year's Eve Thoughts

• I just celebrated changing the last poopy diaper of 2012 (hopefully).  Is that sad that this is my biggest accomplishment tonight?
• I had cookies for dinner
• If you think that's bad, I had crescent rolls with chocolate chips for lunch.  For the 2nd time this week. We call them pain au chocolate (insert French accent here).  Don't judge me.  It's New Year's Eve.  Not sure why that is a valid excuse.
• Found this quote in a book tonight.  Paraphrasing....Our (non-Christian) friends are sending us a message.  'Don't tell me...show me.'  They don't want to see another television evangelist, they don't want o read another book or hear another CD about Christianity, and they don't want to hear your amazing story of conversion.  They want the real thing. They want to witness people living an authentic life supported by the authority of his/her actions.  Someone striving humbly but heroically to live by what is good, true, and noble in the midst of- and in spite of- the modern climate.  I'm gonna try to be the real thing this year!
• Every time I turn on the guide on the TV and see the show Muffin Top I think "Yes, please" but then realize it's some sort of weight loss infomercial and I keep on scrolling.
• I find Psy very annoying but somehow adding MC Hammer to his act got my attention. It's a generational thing I guess. 
• Ok NOW I have changed the last poopy diaper of 2012.  Touche, William, touche!   
• I like my job.  I felt good going back today.  I like being around such awesome people with the goal of helping families be safe.  Sounds corny, but I really do like it.  Call me crazy.  I feel like it's my calling.  I look forward to hiring new staff even when I am sad to see people leave.  It's like a new challenge to see if we can get a fresh employee to take on the overwhelming task at hand.  I should take a maternity leave every few years just to rejuvenate!
• I wish people thought my double chin is as cute as Will's.
• I may have done the MC Hammer shuffle across my living room floor on the way to the bathroom.  And I probably looked really good doing it. 
• I miss my boys tonight.  They would have applauded my dance moves.  William just isn't there yet.  He's not my target audience. 
• Well, now it's 10:49 pm so I might as well stay up and see the ball drop on the East Coast.  It's the least I can do (for who????)
• I'm TOO LEGIT TO QUIT. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!  I HOPE YOUR 2013 IS FILLED WITH MUCH LAUGHTER AND LOVE! 

Home vs. Work

To be a stay at home or not to be?  That is the age old question and one that I have heard about 500 times since Will was born.  "Are you going back to work?"  It seems that the answer is yes.  I had never planned to stay at home with my children.  I find that I am a better parent and better person in general when I can boss people around at work all day.  But the question does bear some assessment as I have enjoyed my time at home more this go around than with my first two kiddos.  I think I'm just generally more relaxed and in the groove this time.  Taking everything as it comes instead of trying to control it.  Third times the charm, I guess.

Whenever I am trying to make decisions, I pull out the ol' pro vs. con list.  So here we go.....

Home: Time for naps, although if I was home permanently with all 3 boys it would never happen.  Today I got two children to sleep at the same time and the 3rd one quietly playing a video game.  I slept for a total of 17 minutes.
Work:  Naps are reportedly frowned upon but I do have a lock on my office door.....note to self....schedule "conference call" each afternoon and put up the ol' "do not disturb" sign
Point goes to:  WORK

Home: More time to exercise and actually get back in shape.  I mean, I have exercised only one day so far but surely I would do more if I was here full time.  I'm just sure of it.  Really. It could happen.
Work: Working full time with 3 children gives me a nice excuse to avoid working out
Point goes to: HOME, only because I hang on to the off chance that I might actually get in shape

Home: Way more time to cook and plan meals.  Unfortunately it has resulted in a nice little muffin top.
Work:  Too busy to stop for lunch or dinner = pre-baby weight
Point goes to: WORK

Home:  Time (and I use the word "time" loosely because I haven't showered in about 36 hours) to be room mom for Justin's Kindergarten Winter Party which entails planning, gathering donations, organizing games, and delegating tasks to the other parents 
Work: Time to be room mom for Justin's Kindergarten Winter Party
Point goes to:  HOME.  Loved every minute of it 

Home: I have found my inner crafty self by way of my obsession with Pinterest 
Work:  Crafts cost $$$$ and really I'm not that good at it anyway. 
Point goes to: WORK

Home:  sweats, yoga pants, no make up, t-shirts.  Need I say more?
Work: pants with buttons (gasp), belts, heels, jewelry
Point goes to: HOME, hands down

Home: Daytime TV
Work: avoiding daytime TV
Point goes to:  WORK  I can only watch so many reruns of Wings and Sex and the City

Home:  Time to eat lunch with Justin at school.....at the Cafeteria
Work:  "forgetting" my lunch so I get to eat Roxanne's
Point goes to:  WORK

Home: Recliner
Work: state issued chair that's approximately 35 years old
Point goes to:  HOME

Home: Managing the freak outs of a 4, 5, and 33 year old (I can't really count Will's crying as freak outs.....yet)
Work: Managing the freak outs of grown women
Point goes to: Amazingly I'm going with WORK on this one.  At least I am not responsible for their general well-being and contributions to society based on my responses to their freak outs

Home:  Getting shit on (literally)
Work: Getting shit on (figuratively)
Point goes to: HOME because in theory that shit will come to an end one of these days

Home: Playing referee to a 4 and 5 year old (an occasionally the 33 year old WITH the 4 and 5 year old)
Work: Playing referee for adults (and I use that word loosely) with mental illness, substance abuse, and general patters of abusive and destructive behaviors
Point goes to:  HOME because I feel like I can make more of a difference in the way they manage themselves in tough times (fingers crossed), but oddly enough I do enjoy managing the conflicts of our clients. Something different every day.  I'm kinda sick in that way.

Home: No more daycare costs, but education responsibilities are on me.  Pretty sure they would only learn how to bake cookies, how Carrie cheated on Aidan with Mr. Big, and how to sing the Nanny's theme song....oh wait, they already know that one. 
Work: Paying a big ol' hunk of money each week for the safety, happiness, and well-being of my children
Point goes to: WORK.  Ellan and Heather just ROCK! 

Well, final score is Home: 6  Work: 7.  I should just stop here while work is still ahead since that is my plan anyway.  I would hate to convince myself otherwise.  So back to work it is.....Monday will be here so quickly.  I'm OK with it.  I really am.  I could use maybe another month or so at home, but I can suck it up and get back to business!   Look out, ladies.....I'm comin' back!!!! (Just in case you were worried)

But it's gonna be hard leaving these sweet faces

Kitchen Table Confessions

My hometown church has a practice of having silent confessions.  During Mass the congregation is led by Father Bob in a meditation of confession.  Today was a Confession Sunday.  I was nervous only because I just couldn't imagine that my three boys could sit quietly through a group meditation. 

In the meditation we are asked to picture ourselves at our kitchen table sitting across from Jesus.  We are to speak freely and openly to him about our concerns, our sins, and whatever else is on our hearts.  It is a truly wonderful experience and I encourage each of you to do it in your own time. 

For many Catholics confession can be daunting.   Confessing your sins out loud to anyone takes guts even if it is a Priest you feel will protect your inner most thoughts and actions.  The Priest is the medium to a discussion with Jesus and the Kitchen Table Confession is a more direct, and likely more open and honest, way to confess our sins. 

I was pleased when all three of my boys were able to remain silent throughout the meditation.  I had attempted to educate them ahead of time of what was to occur and they really took an interest in it.  I also thoroughly enjoyed that immediately following the silent confession period both boys openly confessed that they did not keep their eyes closed the entire time.  Love their honesty!

While I won't go in to the details of my own confession for obvious reasons, I think it's safe to say that I, like most parents, had confessions related to my parenting.  Parenting is so hard.  So very, very hard.  Made harder right now just be the sheer lack of sleep due to having a newborn.  It's a reality that every new parent understands.  It is what it is, I always say!

So, for every time (and there are many....too many) that I feel my parenting is sub-par and for the times when I lose my cool and berate myself for not being grateful enough to still have my children to hold tightly in my arms and tell them I love them, I will instead try to come back to this blog and this time and this experience and remember that I am giving my children the best gift a parent can give: a lesson in prayer and a relationship with Jesus. 

I, like everyone, am so very heavyhearted about the tragedy in Connecticut this past week.  I have a kindergartner and I am better off emotionally if I don't try to put myself in a position of the parents who lost their children.  I am better off just to pray for them in every way possible and to raise my children to do the same. 

So tonight, I revisited the Kitchen Table Confession concept with the boys as a bedtime experience.  Justin's very first statement was "Mom, we can't forget to pray for those kids that died."  Oh, I know honey.   Oh, how I know! 

I asked them to pray their own prayers tonight and talk to Jesus in their hearts.  And of course they have little concept of doing anything quietly or silently in their heads so their "silent" discussion with Jesus at bedtime was spoken aloud. 

Justin's:  Jesus, help me not to kick my brother and not yell at my mom and to make better choices.  And please take care of the kids that were killed today.

Leo's:  Jesus, help me get Will's binky when he 'pits it out and not to yell at my brother when he poops and pees a lot. 

(I especially liked how each of them prayed about how to be a better brother to their younger sibling.)

I encourage you to have a Kitchen Table Discussion with Jesus tonight.  I believe the visual aspect of picturing ones self sitting at the table for the discussion gives extra support to the prayer experience.  For me, I am able to picture Jesus' peaceful and open expression as I confess my deepest thoughts and sins.  No judgement.  No worry that it will result in gossip about me or my loved ones.  No hurt feelings.  And most importantly, forgiveness.  Sweet and complete forgiveness.